


Honey, It Ain't Gonna Stick

by orphan_account



Category: EXO (Band), K-pop
Genre: Fluff, Humor, M/M, Romance, Television Watching
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-07
Updated: 2017-06-07
Packaged: 2018-11-10 00:25:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,035
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11116035
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Tao watches Running Man to improve his Korean, and so makes his boyfriend regret ever asking him for help.





	Honey, It Ain't Gonna Stick

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I don't own anything except the story.
> 
> If you enjoy this, let me know!

When Tao was little—back when his family lived in China—they'd been too poor to own their own TV so he'd grown up watching whatever the town grandmothers had on as they drank tea and gossiped their loved ones into marriages. He'd fallen in love with morning dramas then—variety shows too—cheering with the rest when the network played reruns of  _Ke Wang_ , and crying like a baby when  _Enjoy Yourself Tonight_  got cancelled just three years short of thirty.

Now, though, he lived in Korea, had enough money for his own TV, and since Kris, his boyfriend, was 29, the only thing in his life that was three years short of thirty was Tao himself. He didn't mind that too much—growing up and getting older—because he'd gotten a good education to make his family proud, had found a job where he could be both happy and successful, and had a boyfriend who was Chinese but had been born in Korea and basically just did a wonderful job of making Tao feel at home.

Besides, as he'd gotten older, television had gotten better, and now Tao watched whatever he wanted whenever he wanted; it was great. For a while, when he'd first come to Korea as a university exchange student, Tao had been so homesick that he'd spent all his free time watching Mandarin language dramas—he hadn't even cared that most of them weren't mainland. But when one year in Seoul turned to two and two turned into even more, Tao started watching more Korean dramas in the hopes that his accent and grammar would improve. Coincidentally, it was about that time that he'd started dating Kris and speaking Mandarin again, so it became even more important for Tao to better his Korean.

By then he had already started working after graduation, so the amount of free time which he could—and did—dedicate solely to the small screen above his dresser increased dramatically. That was good, too, because Tao soon realized that he had quite a bit of catching up to do. He went through phases where one drama in any particular genre would leave him wanting to watch a million more, so he blew threw the modern classics pretty quickly—starting with the  _Meteor Garden_  adaptation  _Boys Over Flowers_ and basically working his way forward from there. Occasionally he would take a break from his usual preferences and return to the variety shows of his youth, but mostly Tao just stuck to dramas and he was more than content with that.

Kris, actually, liked to read more than he liked to watch television, but the one concession he'd sometimes make was for  _Running Man,_ not only because it was consistently hilarious, but also because Kris had been the biggest sasaeng fan of Turbo back in the day and meeting Kim Jong Kook was his life dream. Tao hadn't known this about his boyfriend until they moved in together, but he's been more than happy to fit a weekly does of Kris' variety into his drama line-up.

And actually, a few months of watching  _Running Man_  with Kris improved Tao's Korean more than the stilted speech of dramas had in more than two years. That's why, even after Tao brought Kris to a Kim Jong Kook fan meet for his boyfriend's birthday and Kris had then refused to watch any more of the show because the best image of his idol was now in his head, Tao continued to faithfully tune in every Sunday evening.

He was doing just that when he heard a crash and a yelp, which were soon followed by Kris as he burst into their bedroom suddenly with a devastated wail and flung himself onto the bed. "Uri Turbo king's not on the screen right now, is he?" Kris wanted to know before he dared to lift his head and give Tao the explanation he was clearly waiting for.

Tao shook his head before he realized Kris couldn't actually see him with his face buried in a pillow like it was. "Uh," he glanced at the screen for a second before responding, "not right now but he could be at any moment. Should be a commercial coming up though."

Kris hummed, content to wait, and that alone reassured Tao that whatever his boyfriend's issue, if it wasn't drastic enough for him to give up his idol then it couldn't be that serious after all. Tao's gaze returned to the screen but his hands left his phone on the nightstand to lift Kris's shirt and trip senseless patterns up Tao's boyfriend's back. Kris's moan was muffled by the pillow, but Tao could hear it nonetheless and promised himself that after the show was finished and Kris' problem was resolved, the two of them were definitely going to make a night of it; the night was barely dark yet, and not even that late, but forget work the next morning—Tao had already decided he would call in sick.

"You've got two and a half minutes," Tao decreed to his boyfriend once the CF's started, "maybe three."

Kris jumped at the opportunity, literally, too as he leapt up from the bed and grabbed Tao's wrist to drag him toward their living room. "The lamp broke, the overhead light still doesn't have a bulb, and now I can't see well enough to finish my sudoku," he whined helplessly as Tao took in the lamp's broken stem, appraised his boyfriend's impressive build, and wondered why his help was necessary when Kris was more than capable on his own.

"And you interrupted my television time to tell me this why...?" Tao want mad, per se, but he certainly didn't see why he'd had to get off the bed to come out there, especially since he'd been so comfortable.

"You have television time every day, Taozi," Kris pointed out, even though Tao thought that particular detail wasn't at all relevant to their current conversation. "Anyway, I think if you hold it up while I tape it together, we should have it fixed in no time."

"That may be so," Tao agreed, "but probably not in less than three minutes."

Kris looked sheepish when he admitted, "No, probably not," but Tao figured he had as much a right to his TV show as Kris did to his sudoku, and anyway, what kind of boyfriend would he be if he didn't take the time to help when his lover asked it of him?

He didn't say any of this to Kris, though, and instead just heaved a loudly dramatic sigh before leaving the room to grab some duct tape from the kitchen. "Don't ever say I don't love you," he called back over his shoulder as he walked away, and Tao didn't need to look to know that Kris was smiling.

It took a little longer than expected for Tao to return, mostly because Kris had yelled into the kitchen not to bring the blue tape—just as Tao was about to walk back with exactly that one hanging off his wrist. "It's just tape," he grumbled to his boyfriend once he finally made it back to the living room and tossed the roll in Kris' direction.

"The blue will mess up my mojo," Kris explained his reasoning as if it were the most natural thing in the world, "and I just started Expert Level in my sudoku book so I need all the mojo I can get."

"Of course you do." This comment was made under Tao's breath to avoid Kris' wrath, but he was apparently unsuccessful at that because Kris frowned at him before tossing back the tape.

"Just for that," he said, crossing his arms as he walked toward the broken lamp, "you can have the hard job while I stand prettily and keep the stem held together."

Though Tao tried pouting to get Kris to change his mind, it didn't work, so he frowned and reluctantly started the thankless job of feeling for the tape butt. He found it relatively quickly and walked toward where Kris was waiting, leaning down to attach the end to the lamp before walking in circles around it. As he circled, Tao tried not to think about who was finally managing to get the Commander's name tag off his back right about then, but not even Kris' cute concentration face of a taut lip and a furrowed prow could distract him.

With  _Running Man_  unavoidably on his mind, Tao, recalling a recent episode that currently fit his life pretty well, decided to have some fun. He took advantage of Kris' appreciation of his butt as it walked 'round and 'round the lamp stand, and had already taped five times around on top of Kris himself before the other man even realized.

"Yah!" Kris shouted one he recognized the stick of adhesive to his skin and then the tightness of his shirt against his chest when Tao started laughing and wrapping the tape not just around Kris's hands, but Kris' body as well.

"You look like Kwang Soo in that one episode," Tao giggled, even though he knew Kris wouldn't have seen it and wouldn't care regardless.

"Huang Zitao." Kris tried growling in increasing annoyance, but then Tao's lips were on his, silencing him briefly enough for Kris to lose his voice. His next outburst still sounded angry, but it had definitely lost much of its earlier power. "Yah."

Tao kissed Kris again on his way back around, pulling the tape taut between them and smirking against his boyfriend's lips. "You love it," Tao needled, knowing Kris couldn't do anything about the tape even if he tried.

"I do," Kris admitted. "But remind me again why I do? I think I temporarily forgot my reasons the moment my boyfriend reverted back into a twelve year old."

Tao, who related everything back to television if possible, remembered that  _Big Hospital, Little Doctor_  came out when he was twelve, and could thereby declare with confidence that he'd been quite mature at that age, thank you very much. Kris just rolled his eyes at that and stretched his neck out for a peck since any other movement was pretty much constrained by the duct tape.

After a few more times around—and a kiss for Kris every chance Tao got—Tao cut the tape from the roll, tucked the end somewhere Kris couldn't reach it to free himself, and stepped back, surveying his handiwork with a smile. "Looks good," he decreed, brushing his hands together at a job well done.

"Yes, well, that's nice," Kris' compliment wasn't particularly sincere but Tao accepted it anyway. "Can you let me go now?"

Tao pretended to think the request over for a minute before shaking his head and grinning naughtily. "Nope," he said, popping the 'p' for extra emphasis and making Kris glare. "I didn't realize this before, but I kind of like the whole tied up look."

At that, Kris' expression changed from annoyed amusement to barely concealed lust in a matter of mere seconds. Tao noticed this because he noticed everything where Kris was concerned, so he licked his lips slowly, sensuously, as he stalked toward his boyfriend like a lion hunting prey.

"Kinky," Kris' murmur was impressed until Tao swallowed the words right out of his boyfriend's mouth with wet lips and a pierced tongue.

Things between them basically proceeded as expected from there, and their kisses were getting increasingly heated as Tao basically curled himself around his boyfriend and had his way with a partner who was more than willing to be taken care of, so to speak. At least, Kris  _had_  been willing—until the tape constraining his hands went from sexy to "in the way" really,  _really_  fast.

After that, Tao had to return to the kitchen for scissors to set his boyfriend free; Kris moaned for nearly five minutes about the questioble morality of Running Man, as well as the still-broken state of his sudoku lamp; and the mood which they'd so scorchingly worked together to create had to be  _completely_  rekindled from scratch—with no tape for added fun this time around, either.


End file.
